An even BETTER list of what I hate at shows.
-Parents/older folks who come and do nothing but scowl/hold their kids stuff/complain until it’s time to leave.
-Over-burly, meatheaded dudes who think it’s cool to beat the shit out of every person, male and female alike, who comes in their path. Beating the crap out of a girl has never been, and will never be, cool.
-Parents who ask what time the show will be over.
-People who make fun of those who are singing along, regardless if they know the words or not. SO. WHAT?
-The inevitable pack of teenieweenies who make the homemade puffy-paint shirts with the show/bands/date/hitsongnames on them and wear them to the show. That will never cease to be tacky. Period.
-When someone tries to hustle a merch dude. That’s pretty low of you (unless his name is Austin and he’s grubbing over For The Record’s merch. Then you have my full permission).
-When people have more bad things to say about a band than good. We’re all horriblly self-indulgent critics. You like compliments too, right? So do they. Even if they’re the worst band alive, you don’t HAVE to say it out loud. Wait until you’re back in the car with your girlfriend/boyfriend/bestbuds/whoever and THEN laugh. But don’t give some dude shit while he’s up there earning his keep. Could you do better? I don’t see YOU up there, bearing your soul to a room of strangers. Everyone has SOME redeeming quality, even the hack-slash, no-self-confidence-or-stage-presence-whatsoever thirteen year old I watched brutally screw up some Hilary Duff and Vanessa Carlton covers last night. She still kept trudging on, picked up her dropped pick and continued to sing her heart out, and her voice wasn’t too bad either. If I can say something nice about HER, you can say something nice about The Ready Set or whoever the flavor of the week is today. Jeez.
-The annoying whiny scene-cows that have to bitch to everyone around them about everything. It’s a show. Grow up.
-Those who complain about moshing/getting hit by incoming moshers. Maybe you shouldn’t have been standing right next to Benny Br00tal as the breakdown to ‘Stab Your Ears To Sing The Song’ came on. Dopic move, dumbass.
-Those who force others to leave a show early because of petty crap. You should have eaten lunch and took your Mydol before you showed up. Don’t make your friend miss out too, just because you’re ‘tired’ and have a ‘killer migraine’. You’re lucky I’m not your show-buddy.
-Those who make others LEAVE barricade while the band they came to see is up there killing it. There’s no excuse, and it’s happened to me more times than I’d like to admit.
-When someone brags that their uncle’s friend’s girlfriend’s brother went to school with the touring bassist of insert-band-here, expecting some gratification. We all have Six Degrees of Seperation with SOMEBODY, even our favorite bands. I couldn’t tell you how many ways I connect to FOB like that, but you don’t see me shoving it down your throat, expecting you to bow down and worship the ground I walk on. Band members/musicians are people too. They feel, think, eat, sleep, breathe, love, hate, crap, desire and dream just as you do. Nobody thinks you’re cooler just because you know Travis from We The King’s through your brother’s roomate’s aunt’s next-door-neighbor.
-Obnoxious show goers in general.
-Those who think that owning a $200 digital camera, plus ‘interesting’ angles, some photoshop and a flickr account makes them a ‘photographer’. It’s called ‘craft’ for a reason.
And most of all?
-Those who are too snobbish/trendy to go to a show, have a good time, make some friends, sing some songs, buy some stuff, support music and enjoy themselves without thinking about the ‘scene points’ they’ll earn, the ‘cred’ they’ll get on Facebook or other prententious banter that brings down our scene. Forget it. Just go. Let go. Enjoy music. That’s what it’s all about. Anything else is just a waste of time.
Oh, and anyone who thinks The JoBros, Miley Cyrus, The Bieb, any Disney-band known to man, etc, is legitimate music. There’s just no hope for you. Period.
